panama city ~ here we are a week from lovers day. we can smell it in the air. and fyi, im reporting from bed and using my new tablet. so there will be many typos, just forgive me. also we have huge news. huuuuge news. possibly bigger than whoever goes home tonight. for the first time in years, daddy (me) is not eating ANYTHING for dinner tonight. thats right, zero calories. that has never happened before ever. i dont know if maybe this is a new side of me or possibly im maturing...........but probably not. very shocking though i know. and to think, i only had like 1500 cals for lunch, how am i not starving???
so kacie b gets the first one on one date with little turtle. big surprise, frontrunner. a private island would be cool, unless youre stranded there with ben. good thing the camera crew was there to knock down and open the coconuts and catch\cook the fish. did anyone see the long john silvers bag off to the side?
group date~the girls head into the deep jungle where ben rescues them. jaime claims he is a "man's man" because hes steering a long canoe with a johnson motor attached. hes a regular clint eastwood if you ask me. courtney, aka russell brand, attempts to grab all the attention as suspected. the only good thing about this date is that courtney is not on a one on one date. those are tough to watch with her. at the evening cocktail party, lindzi looks lovely. their connection seems strong. dumpsville should not be in her future. im getting hungry by the way. i think russell brand is wearing txhe same surong froma few weeks ago. ben is acting like a dumb 7th grade boy starring at the victoria secret manicans. jaime isnt able to makethe shot when it counts. which is not a big deal, as its time for her to take the long flight home. she needs to be the goner tonight, we shall see.
emily kind of reminds me of rachel mcadams, anyone? anyone? just a little in the face, but mostly in her smile. she wisens up and gets real with benny and he likes us. she might me back in the game. russell brand must have seen them kissing bc she doesnt accept emilys truce. russell takes no prisoners and nor does her unibrow. and what do we know, lindzi, whom we thought looked lovely, gets the group rose good for her. shes been under the radar recently and im glad that mr turtle head looked elsewhere besides russell. because her other personalities are killing us.
doubles date~brakrey (in chinese) and and racher are headed out to rearn sarsa (salsa). im torn between the two. initially blake was the bad girl, but shes improved much. anyone see rachels khaki shorts with the belt through the loops? dont see that on ladies much anymore. its a lost fashion. do we think ben likes brakreys body paint? i dunno, i would estimate prob not. he may be afraid of bringing her home to mommy. gosh im hungry now. george is sawing logs next to me though so no delicious dish will come from her. im guessing rachel goes home, so lets see if daddys right..........the food at their dinner is making me even hungrier. crap. actually i dont know now. ben has a weird tone in his voice with blake. and noooooooo, brakrey is gone. just when we were starting to like her. shes pissed, but at least she got some cool vacas out of it tho. good to know she was genuinely upset atleast.
cocktair party~casey gets bamboozled by harrison, who currently has my job. somehow directs her to admit that shes still in love with her ex. harrison is like obi won kanobe (sp?) from star wars. he used the force to get her to admit it. amazing. ben acts likehes so surprised when they show up. even though we see the camera crew hanging out and play
ing board games in his room and they happen to be rolling when she comes in. what a shame, as casey is def one of the cuter ladies. who elselikes it when harrison gets to console the bawling girls and be their knight in shining armor? we know he does.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Monday, January 30, 2012
Getting Loco in Rico - Ben Mistaken
This week we're in Puerto Rico....a lovely German town founded by the Kenyans in the late 1950's. They speak a beautiful dialect of french-polynesian there. I hear it's a lovely place. And after some in-show research, it appears rather affordable to travel to. Perhaps we will need to do an on site visit and check it out. Who's with me?
Ben makes several Californian mistakes this week. The poor fellow is blinded and misguided by the wine. I feel for him, he's probably kicking himself. Nicki gets the first date and it's.....a wash. The rain pouring down on them is indicative of their relationship. It's all washed up. Not going anywhere. Nice girl, nice teeth, probably has good breath being a dental hygienist. Our friend Christy Miller Blankenships is also a dental hygienist, and I know she's a good one because anytime I ask her, she is willing to smell my breath. That's when you know true dedication. Anyway, it's just not there between Nick and Ben-jammin. The only good part about their date was seeing Ben's sweet get up from the costume store. He could certainly pass for a drug lord. I'm very surprised Nicki gets a rose rather than someone like Jennifer. The connection doesn't appear to be very strong and she hasn't gotten a lot of camera time. Oh and by the way, not all of us think you have to live with someone before you can truly know them. It's like buying a digital camera - do your research, read the reviews, and you'll know which one's the right one. I don't think you need to go and buy 10 different cameras and try them all out. All I had to do was ask 2 of Kate's best friends what she was like, and that's all I needed to know, done deal. I didn't know her last name, but that was not important in 9th grade. I think Ben flipped a coin on this one. I don't think Nicki will have the chance to share a household with Ben.
Now the group date was a great time. Loved it. The field they played on reminded me of the filed we played on in a summer league out in Hawaii...old, rusting, turf field, and 0 fans in the stands. Great times that summer was. Go Mighty Menehunes. I wish I could have partaken in this date....simply to watch these ladies in action. Seeing a girl sprint...talk about entertainment! No offense to you feminists out there, but it's just not normal for females to sprint. It's unnatural. It's like a man holding a spatula or folding clothes - just doesn't work or make sense. Some of these ladies look like they had some butch haircuts back in their highschool days...they were smashing the ball. I was impressed. I think we'd all agree that Blakely should've gotten MVP. Great hustle and heart. And I'm pretty sure Ben threw Jennifer a curveball, so we'll let that strikeout slide. I bet those ladies smelled lovely after that competition too. Possibly the BEST line of the season thus far was Kacie B. to Courtney near the end of the game, "You Defense your _ _ _ off!!!" Hahahaha, talk about intensity. She turned defense into a verb it was so serious. And it looks like her pep talk worked, as the red team pulled it out for the beach party.
At the beach party, Kacie B. and Ben have another solid encounter, with her picking up the group date rose, again placing her as the front runner. I'm very surprised Jamie is still around, not sure why. Maybe laying low is the name of the game at this point? She's being good at it. ?Courtney yet again emerges as the villain, shocker. That evil uni-brow is becoming more and more mean, and more and more prevalent. It appeared to be 1/4'' further along than last week. By the championship episode, it will be unified and she will have more power than ever. It's going to be good.
Elyse has also been flying low...and it was a little surprising that he kicked her off instead of a Nicki or Jamie or Casey S. Now, poor little Elyse quit her job to join the show. Let me give all of you lovely, aspiring, potential Bachelor-girl candidates out there some advice - don't quit your job! Unless you'er a professional blogger, like Jenna was. If your job allows you to go, do it. But let's not eliminate our livelihood for love so long as our current president is in office. This blog is a taxable entity so I can push my political and religious views on you all. Deal with it. We can all tell that at dinner, Ben is looking for excuses to get rid of her. He kind of forces her into a corner and she can't find her way out. Poor girl, I liked her, from what little we knew about her. Weird that he proposed to Ashley H. but wouldn't like Elyse...he must like the circus folk!
Thennnnnnnn we have the lady of the night, Courtney, sneak in. Ben should have known, any nice young lady who's willing to unclothe in front of the camera/millions of viewers is probably not the one to bring home to mother. Let's just HOPE that he knows what he's doing and already knows he can't give her the ring, and is just keeping her around for producer purposes. FYI, when Ben took his panties off, it appeared he was wearing some rather skimpy ones as well. Quite possibly a man-thong. Wouldn't surprise me. Probably even had tassles on them. Ben has a lapse in judgment and should feel guilty...it was after hours and against the rules. No bueno. At the cocktail party, Ben's convo with Jennifer was not as great as it could've been, obviously it's easier to see now. But I never would have thought she would be gone tonight. Again, second lapse in judgment for the night. The only thing I can think of is that he eliminated her due to the strikeout. That must have been his only criteria. Bad form. Emily again can't figure it out, and I thought for sure she was gone. Ben must actually like her in order to keep her around after her annoying convos.
Summary - we're getting down to the nitty gritty, and good people have to start being canned. So at some point it has to happen, however we were blindsided tonight. I had several ladies in mind who were on the chopping block, and none went home. Jennifer and Elyse were very surprising. But again, Ben was googoo over Ashley H. so who the heck knows what he likes. I can't figure him out, especially after the banana hammock he was wearing before skinny dipping.
Front Runner - Kacie B.
Number Two - Lindzi
XOXO
The Bachelor Wizard
Ben makes several Californian mistakes this week. The poor fellow is blinded and misguided by the wine. I feel for him, he's probably kicking himself. Nicki gets the first date and it's.....a wash. The rain pouring down on them is indicative of their relationship. It's all washed up. Not going anywhere. Nice girl, nice teeth, probably has good breath being a dental hygienist. Our friend Christy Miller Blankenships is also a dental hygienist, and I know she's a good one because anytime I ask her, she is willing to smell my breath. That's when you know true dedication. Anyway, it's just not there between Nick and Ben-jammin. The only good part about their date was seeing Ben's sweet get up from the costume store. He could certainly pass for a drug lord. I'm very surprised Nicki gets a rose rather than someone like Jennifer. The connection doesn't appear to be very strong and she hasn't gotten a lot of camera time. Oh and by the way, not all of us think you have to live with someone before you can truly know them. It's like buying a digital camera - do your research, read the reviews, and you'll know which one's the right one. I don't think you need to go and buy 10 different cameras and try them all out. All I had to do was ask 2 of Kate's best friends what she was like, and that's all I needed to know, done deal. I didn't know her last name, but that was not important in 9th grade. I think Ben flipped a coin on this one. I don't think Nicki will have the chance to share a household with Ben.
Now the group date was a great time. Loved it. The field they played on reminded me of the filed we played on in a summer league out in Hawaii...old, rusting, turf field, and 0 fans in the stands. Great times that summer was. Go Mighty Menehunes. I wish I could have partaken in this date....simply to watch these ladies in action. Seeing a girl sprint...talk about entertainment! No offense to you feminists out there, but it's just not normal for females to sprint. It's unnatural. It's like a man holding a spatula or folding clothes - just doesn't work or make sense. Some of these ladies look like they had some butch haircuts back in their highschool days...they were smashing the ball. I was impressed. I think we'd all agree that Blakely should've gotten MVP. Great hustle and heart. And I'm pretty sure Ben threw Jennifer a curveball, so we'll let that strikeout slide. I bet those ladies smelled lovely after that competition too. Possibly the BEST line of the season thus far was Kacie B. to Courtney near the end of the game, "You Defense your _ _ _ off!!!" Hahahaha, talk about intensity. She turned defense into a verb it was so serious. And it looks like her pep talk worked, as the red team pulled it out for the beach party.
At the beach party, Kacie B. and Ben have another solid encounter, with her picking up the group date rose, again placing her as the front runner. I'm very surprised Jamie is still around, not sure why. Maybe laying low is the name of the game at this point? She's being good at it. ?Courtney yet again emerges as the villain, shocker. That evil uni-brow is becoming more and more mean, and more and more prevalent. It appeared to be 1/4'' further along than last week. By the championship episode, it will be unified and she will have more power than ever. It's going to be good.
Elyse has also been flying low...and it was a little surprising that he kicked her off instead of a Nicki or Jamie or Casey S. Now, poor little Elyse quit her job to join the show. Let me give all of you lovely, aspiring, potential Bachelor-girl candidates out there some advice - don't quit your job! Unless you'er a professional blogger, like Jenna was. If your job allows you to go, do it. But let's not eliminate our livelihood for love so long as our current president is in office. This blog is a taxable entity so I can push my political and religious views on you all. Deal with it. We can all tell that at dinner, Ben is looking for excuses to get rid of her. He kind of forces her into a corner and she can't find her way out. Poor girl, I liked her, from what little we knew about her. Weird that he proposed to Ashley H. but wouldn't like Elyse...he must like the circus folk!
Thennnnnnnn we have the lady of the night, Courtney, sneak in. Ben should have known, any nice young lady who's willing to unclothe in front of the camera/millions of viewers is probably not the one to bring home to mother. Let's just HOPE that he knows what he's doing and already knows he can't give her the ring, and is just keeping her around for producer purposes. FYI, when Ben took his panties off, it appeared he was wearing some rather skimpy ones as well. Quite possibly a man-thong. Wouldn't surprise me. Probably even had tassles on them. Ben has a lapse in judgment and should feel guilty...it was after hours and against the rules. No bueno. At the cocktail party, Ben's convo with Jennifer was not as great as it could've been, obviously it's easier to see now. But I never would have thought she would be gone tonight. Again, second lapse in judgment for the night. The only thing I can think of is that he eliminated her due to the strikeout. That must have been his only criteria. Bad form. Emily again can't figure it out, and I thought for sure she was gone. Ben must actually like her in order to keep her around after her annoying convos.
Summary - we're getting down to the nitty gritty, and good people have to start being canned. So at some point it has to happen, however we were blindsided tonight. I had several ladies in mind who were on the chopping block, and none went home. Jennifer and Elyse were very surprising. But again, Ben was googoo over Ashley H. so who the heck knows what he likes. I can't figure him out, especially after the banana hammock he was wearing before skinny dipping.
Front Runner - Kacie B.
Number Two - Lindzi
XOXO
The Bachelor Wizard
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Fishing for Love in the Mormon State
Park City Utah - Rachel gets the first one on one date with Beeny the Weiney. Park City is just lovely. Who's been there? I have never, however I would partake in it. Kacie B. is not handling the other dates well, and understandably so. I'll tell you what I don't like about this show - the short timeline that they are allowed to get to know each other. 6-8 weeks? I mean c'mon. How are you really supposed to get to know them in that time? It took Kate over a month to get her first smooch from me back in Summer of '99. And even then I only did it because of a dare. It was all down the tube from there. I will not allow Erin Jr. to play truth or dare...it was my demise.
I wonder what Ben and the girls are thinking when they're heading out to a date. I doubt they have any clue what it's going to be...and they're probably just hoping it doesn't involve sky diving or swimming with sharks. Although I think those dates the ones where you really get to know a girl. How are you supposed to see a girl's true feelings in a vineyard or by yourself in a canoe? That is, unless you throw her overboard. That possibly needed to happen here on this date. Rachel and Bean talked about really intimate stuff, like beaver dams and general building construction. It ain't going well...let's put ourselves out of our misery. Cut the ties before they get too snug. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand he blew it. His only hope is for a bear to come along. Doesn't happen though.
The group date is in the great outdoors. I don't really foresee him as Al Boreland/an outdoorsman...especially when he rode up on the horse and said, "today is going to be rad", I guess that's Californian-outdoors-talk. These ladies need a real man....like a blogger. I've got lots of good memories in waders....only difference is mine is always with a large group of men instead of women. I prefer it that way. Side note, everytime we see Monica, she has a sweet hair bun, or sometimes it looks like it's literally tied in a bow, at all times of the day. It didn't look like Courtney's catch was legit...I'll have to check my inside sources. Unless they didn't start filming it until like 10 minutes after she actually hooked it...trout don't just give up like that. AND, they let it die when it was probably in a catch and release area. I hope they got caught by the park ranger.
Nicki Nick is near the bottom of our list. I don't think I see a future with her or the pant-suit jacket that she wore. Her and Monica need the boot. And now Samantha comes in and knocks it out of the park. The look on her face during their conversation can only be described as........uhh whattt? According to my inside sources, Samantha's departure was not because Benny didn't like her....but rather because she was geting a little too close to some (one) of the folks behind the scenes. I believe it...where there's smoke, there's fire. And Courtney's unibrow. Kacie and Benny love each other, she's definitely one of the front runners. You can tell they just get along together and it's not awkward between them.
Who else likes Courtney's facial expressions? They remind me of Jessica Simpson when she sings (see image above). Benny and Jennifer get the other one on one date. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, you go girl. Represent the 405 lady. She's rocking the bikini in the fall, so kudoz to her. I don't start getting my bikini body ready (along with spray tanning) until March. Now this is a real date....let's get some fear and emotion involved. That's when we really get to know each other. And we all know how those harnesses fit on guys, so Jennifer probably liked that aspect. They have a lovely time in the crater (I would have been scared for fish biting my toes). And they have a good discussion at dinner. Ben clearly realizes the kind of girl she is. She really is a kind and genuine girl, which I think all guys deep down want. Sure the Michelle Moneys are great, but in the end, we want a Molly Malaney. Ben knows this, so he gives Jennifer a rose. Good job Benjy, and great job Jennifer. LYLAS girl, holler at me soon so we can chat.
Alright I'm really hacked off. I just spent like 30 minutes watching and typing my synopsis of the rose ceremony...and somehow I selected the text and deleted it. Definitely an amateur/female move right there, so please forgive me. My re-synopsis probably won't be as good this time around though. Obviously this whole event is about the Evil Uni-Court. Emily is so concerned that she falls into the trap of worrying about the other ladies. Can't do it...it's a downward spiral. Ben even warned her. Certainly we all agree with her, but it probably would have been better for her to just focus on her and Benny's relationship and let the cards fall. And if she doesn't get a rose, THEN take a minute and give him a warning. That's been done before and is the best strategy. Courtney's facial expressions make it seem like she has multiple personalities...perhaps she does (or...they do?) And somehow throughout all of this, MONICA has now become the house therapist! The girl, who during the first episode, we weren't sure which team she was on, or which side of the road she drives on, or if she played softball at PC North in Oklahoma City like Kate did.......now she is the voice of reason. Love it.
Monica does NOT receive a rose at the ceremony. Here's my take: Nicki shouldn't have gotten one, the spark is only a small ash in that relationshp. Emily got lucky and has a chance to redeem herself. Monica's departure is not a surprise. I don't think she was terribly upset, and will likely be calling Blakely when the show is over. Jamie also is dangerously flying low.
Front Runners: Kacie B, Jennifer, Lindzi
Sleeper: Elyse
They should film the Bachelor in Utah for every episode....the state of Utah is like the tv show, only in real life - one man has multiple women all clamering for him. Ben should stay in Utah, and just pick several of them right now, marry them all, and be done with it!
XOXO
Bachelor Wizard
I wonder what Ben and the girls are thinking when they're heading out to a date. I doubt they have any clue what it's going to be...and they're probably just hoping it doesn't involve sky diving or swimming with sharks. Although I think those dates the ones where you really get to know a girl. How are you supposed to see a girl's true feelings in a vineyard or by yourself in a canoe? That is, unless you throw her overboard. That possibly needed to happen here on this date. Rachel and Bean talked about really intimate stuff, like beaver dams and general building construction. It ain't going well...let's put ourselves out of our misery. Cut the ties before they get too snug. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand he blew it. His only hope is for a bear to come along. Doesn't happen though.
The group date is in the great outdoors. I don't really foresee him as Al Boreland/an outdoorsman...especially when he rode up on the horse and said, "today is going to be rad", I guess that's Californian-outdoors-talk. These ladies need a real man....like a blogger. I've got lots of good memories in waders....only difference is mine is always with a large group of men instead of women. I prefer it that way. Side note, everytime we see Monica, she has a sweet hair bun, or sometimes it looks like it's literally tied in a bow, at all times of the day. It didn't look like Courtney's catch was legit...I'll have to check my inside sources. Unless they didn't start filming it until like 10 minutes after she actually hooked it...trout don't just give up like that. AND, they let it die when it was probably in a catch and release area. I hope they got caught by the park ranger.
Nicki Nick is near the bottom of our list. I don't think I see a future with her or the pant-suit jacket that she wore. Her and Monica need the boot. And now Samantha comes in and knocks it out of the park. The look on her face during their conversation can only be described as........uhh whattt? According to my inside sources, Samantha's departure was not because Benny didn't like her....but rather because she was geting a little too close to some (one) of the folks behind the scenes. I believe it...where there's smoke, there's fire. And Courtney's unibrow. Kacie and Benny love each other, she's definitely one of the front runners. You can tell they just get along together and it's not awkward between them.
Who else likes Courtney's facial expressions? They remind me of Jessica Simpson when she sings (see image above). Benny and Jennifer get the other one on one date. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, you go girl. Represent the 405 lady. She's rocking the bikini in the fall, so kudoz to her. I don't start getting my bikini body ready (along with spray tanning) until March. Now this is a real date....let's get some fear and emotion involved. That's when we really get to know each other. And we all know how those harnesses fit on guys, so Jennifer probably liked that aspect. They have a lovely time in the crater (I would have been scared for fish biting my toes). And they have a good discussion at dinner. Ben clearly realizes the kind of girl she is. She really is a kind and genuine girl, which I think all guys deep down want. Sure the Michelle Moneys are great, but in the end, we want a Molly Malaney. Ben knows this, so he gives Jennifer a rose. Good job Benjy, and great job Jennifer. LYLAS girl, holler at me soon so we can chat.
Alright I'm really hacked off. I just spent like 30 minutes watching and typing my synopsis of the rose ceremony...and somehow I selected the text and deleted it. Definitely an amateur/female move right there, so please forgive me. My re-synopsis probably won't be as good this time around though. Obviously this whole event is about the Evil Uni-Court. Emily is so concerned that she falls into the trap of worrying about the other ladies. Can't do it...it's a downward spiral. Ben even warned her. Certainly we all agree with her, but it probably would have been better for her to just focus on her and Benny's relationship and let the cards fall. And if she doesn't get a rose, THEN take a minute and give him a warning. That's been done before and is the best strategy. Courtney's facial expressions make it seem like she has multiple personalities...perhaps she does (or...they do?) And somehow throughout all of this, MONICA has now become the house therapist! The girl, who during the first episode, we weren't sure which team she was on, or which side of the road she drives on, or if she played softball at PC North in Oklahoma City like Kate did.......now she is the voice of reason. Love it.
Monica does NOT receive a rose at the ceremony. Here's my take: Nicki shouldn't have gotten one, the spark is only a small ash in that relationshp. Emily got lucky and has a chance to redeem herself. Monica's departure is not a surprise. I don't think she was terribly upset, and will likely be calling Blakely when the show is over. Jamie also is dangerously flying low.
Front Runners: Kacie B, Jennifer, Lindzi
Sleeper: Elyse
They should film the Bachelor in Utah for every episode....the state of Utah is like the tv show, only in real life - one man has multiple women all clamering for him. Ben should stay in Utah, and just pick several of them right now, marry them all, and be done with it!
XOXO
Bachelor Wizard
Monday, January 16, 2012
Love you Shawty
We're back boys and girls. Valentine's day is quickly approaching, which always draws me to this blog. Love is in the air, birds are chirping, buns are in the oven (Lord help me). Let's get after it:
First date - Emily...golden gate bridge date. big whoop...cry me a river about heights. ben slobbers while kissing. I semi-like Emily, although she looks just like Kendra (Hugh Hefner's Kendra). Little heavy on the makeup, so we need to get an all natural look before we can make a solid decision.
Group date - skiing in San Fran. Kacie B is a circus skiier, but stole the show with her butt-skiing. Haven't ever tried that before. Kacie also knocks it out later that night. Ben really likes her. Appears their connection is a little more unique than the other girls'. Blakely is a little scoundrel...typical theta. Catty and just wants all the attention...none of the other girls like to be around her! TAK lady, TAK (that aint kappa). She obviously did not remember to KIPMIF.
Brittney makes a sudden departure, which I don't think anyone balked at? Didn't really know she was here with us on the show, but we wish her the best of luck. Let's choke out the weeds so we can get to that final rose boys and girls.
Rachel gets the group date rose, not a huge surprise since she was one of the few that they even showed him spending time with. She's ok...not real keen on the deep voice but maybe Ben's into that sort of thing. Me...I'm more into the softballers with the short hair. Shoulda seen Kate in high school...
Lindzi gets a one-on-one date with Benjamin in San Fran. She got the very first, first impression rose, so you'd think she's high on his list. She's middle of the road for me, I'd say. they have a nice little date at city hall...and yet again Ben appears to be a slobbery smoocher. I would not accept that ladies...someone needs to educate him. Lindzi gets the million dollar question - why are you still single? People (guys and girls) tell me all the time they wish i was still single. But my baby's mama locked her claws on me early and firmly...like a pit bull on a wild pig. Quote of the night: "Babe, welcome to dumpsville, population you"...ha! What a way to break up with someone. At least Lindzi's ex tried to be comedic and lighten the blow. I'll have to remember that one.
Our local favorite Jennifer gets after Benjamin...she lays it out there. And Ben-jamin rewards it with a lovely compliment of her being the best kisser. After getting the final rose, that's the next best prize!!! Third best prize is the wardrobe. that's yet to be determined. Courtney is obviously the season's drama queen and standard whacko...just like Rozlyn, Michelle from Jake Pavelka's season, Elizabeth Kitt, and Michelle Money in year's passed. Although I forgive Michelle Money now, as we've heard good things from some of her fellow costars. Courtney is obviously attractive, however she does have a little uni-brow squeaking in there in the middle. She's a few brows away looking Kazakhstanian.
Shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawty Shawntel....my girl. I still don't like your name, but love you girl. Curvalicious. I could spend a few more minutes on your hair, but you're still a doll. This was a great surprise for us. This was like a good ole fashioned KKG/Theta fight. I was hoping for some slaps to be thrown. Unfortunately all we had were insults. We all know Shawty is a sweet angel. And all these tricks be frontin' on her. Back off. If Ben had a brain, he would have kicked out about 5 of these broads (ie... Erika and Jaclyn) and kept Shawty in one of their places. Unfortunately, he goes for damage control instead and let's her go. I bet we see Benjy and Shawty hollerin after the season is over. Just watch.
Rose Ceremony - Courtney - idiot. Gives models a bad name. Makes us all think they're unintelligent...oh wait. Kacie - Great. Elyse - Not bad. Jamie - are you serious. Jennifer - Good. Casey S - who are you. Blakely - skeletor (in a nice way?). Monica - producers' choice. Nikki - snoozer. Samantha - don't recognize you, did you sneak in with Shawty. Erika - good strategy, I would have tried maybe throwing up also. Gotta set yourself apart though. I like it. Jaclyn - sorry hun. LYLAS. And Shawty - you got guts girl. Love you...stay in touch. Tweet me.
Wow...what an episode boys and girls. Lots of emotions flying around. I really shouldn't be watching this while I'm pregnant...not good for my hormones. The good news is, we're one episode closer to me taking Chris Harrison's job. The bad news...Shawty got hurt again. Poor girl. Benjy made some good decisions otherwise. He did what he needed to do. Here's the synopsis:
Contenders:
Kacie B. - if she doesn't win it, my vote for the next Bachelorette
Jennifer
Elyse
Lindzi
Catfish (bottom dwellers, next to go):
Jamie
Monica
XOXO
The Bachelor Wizard
First date - Emily...golden gate bridge date. big whoop...cry me a river about heights. ben slobbers while kissing. I semi-like Emily, although she looks just like Kendra (Hugh Hefner's Kendra). Little heavy on the makeup, so we need to get an all natural look before we can make a solid decision.
Group date - skiing in San Fran. Kacie B is a circus skiier, but stole the show with her butt-skiing. Haven't ever tried that before. Kacie also knocks it out later that night. Ben really likes her. Appears their connection is a little more unique than the other girls'. Blakely is a little scoundrel...typical theta. Catty and just wants all the attention...none of the other girls like to be around her! TAK lady, TAK (that aint kappa). She obviously did not remember to KIPMIF.
Brittney makes a sudden departure, which I don't think anyone balked at? Didn't really know she was here with us on the show, but we wish her the best of luck. Let's choke out the weeds so we can get to that final rose boys and girls.
Rachel gets the group date rose, not a huge surprise since she was one of the few that they even showed him spending time with. She's ok...not real keen on the deep voice but maybe Ben's into that sort of thing. Me...I'm more into the softballers with the short hair. Shoulda seen Kate in high school...
Lindzi gets a one-on-one date with Benjamin in San Fran. She got the very first, first impression rose, so you'd think she's high on his list. She's middle of the road for me, I'd say. they have a nice little date at city hall...and yet again Ben appears to be a slobbery smoocher. I would not accept that ladies...someone needs to educate him. Lindzi gets the million dollar question - why are you still single? People (guys and girls) tell me all the time they wish i was still single. But my baby's mama locked her claws on me early and firmly...like a pit bull on a wild pig. Quote of the night: "Babe, welcome to dumpsville, population you"...ha! What a way to break up with someone. At least Lindzi's ex tried to be comedic and lighten the blow. I'll have to remember that one.
Our local favorite Jennifer gets after Benjamin...she lays it out there. And Ben-jamin rewards it with a lovely compliment of her being the best kisser. After getting the final rose, that's the next best prize!!! Third best prize is the wardrobe. that's yet to be determined. Courtney is obviously the season's drama queen and standard whacko...just like Rozlyn, Michelle from Jake Pavelka's season, Elizabeth Kitt, and Michelle Money in year's passed. Although I forgive Michelle Money now, as we've heard good things from some of her fellow costars. Courtney is obviously attractive, however she does have a little uni-brow squeaking in there in the middle. She's a few brows away looking Kazakhstanian.
Shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawty Shawntel....my girl. I still don't like your name, but love you girl. Curvalicious. I could spend a few more minutes on your hair, but you're still a doll. This was a great surprise for us. This was like a good ole fashioned KKG/Theta fight. I was hoping for some slaps to be thrown. Unfortunately all we had were insults. We all know Shawty is a sweet angel. And all these tricks be frontin' on her. Back off. If Ben had a brain, he would have kicked out about 5 of these broads (ie... Erika and Jaclyn) and kept Shawty in one of their places. Unfortunately, he goes for damage control instead and let's her go. I bet we see Benjy and Shawty hollerin after the season is over. Just watch.
Rose Ceremony - Courtney - idiot. Gives models a bad name. Makes us all think they're unintelligent...oh wait. Kacie - Great. Elyse - Not bad. Jamie - are you serious. Jennifer - Good. Casey S - who are you. Blakely - skeletor (in a nice way?). Monica - producers' choice. Nikki - snoozer. Samantha - don't recognize you, did you sneak in with Shawty. Erika - good strategy, I would have tried maybe throwing up also. Gotta set yourself apart though. I like it. Jaclyn - sorry hun. LYLAS. And Shawty - you got guts girl. Love you...stay in touch. Tweet me.
Wow...what an episode boys and girls. Lots of emotions flying around. I really shouldn't be watching this while I'm pregnant...not good for my hormones. The good news is, we're one episode closer to me taking Chris Harrison's job. The bad news...Shawty got hurt again. Poor girl. Benjy made some good decisions otherwise. He did what he needed to do. Here's the synopsis:
Contenders:
Kacie B. - if she doesn't win it, my vote for the next Bachelorette
Jennifer
Elyse
Lindzi
Catfish (bottom dwellers, next to go):
Jamie
Monica
XOXO
The Bachelor Wizard
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